Sigh. So I’m up 0.4lbs this week and back to 180.0lbs with a total loss to date of 71.6lbs. I just don’t know why I can’t get my head back into it. Consistency has gone out the window. I’m definitely starting to feel the stress of this. I suppose what’s not helping is that this is where I went off course last time.
Last time I lost a significant amount of weight (52lbs) I found getting from 180 to 175 to be incredibly difficult. Even then I hit an all time low of 176.6 and then promptly jumped back up into the 180s. For me there is something very significant about getting below 175. Something about it being overweight rather then obese, I think. For whatever reason I’ve built it up in my mind and so it remains this golden egg I keep striving for, but yet never getting there.
I fear this is just going to be a repeat of last time. I fear I will give up because I won’t see the results I want. I fear I will regain this weight. I fear I won’t be able to make it through the summer with all the work and the travelling I have to do. I fear.
I’ve decided I need to revist last August. I need to see what clicked for me, what made me commit. What’s changed? Why have I let this slip, why do I feel myself slipping into doing what’s easy rather then what’s right? I don’t have any answers in this post – only questions. Questions only I can answer for myself. Part of me feels like if I could just get to 175 everything will be smooth sailing from there (yes, yes, I know!) But I know if I don’t learn/train myself to eat properly, to clearly identify portion sizes, to listen to my body when it is full then none of this will stick. I’m not there yet and I can’t give up, but it’s getting harder.
To get myself back on track I am going to make two goals for this week:
1. This week I will eat proper meals, not just nibbling here and there, filling up yet never filling up.
2. This week I will also sign up for another 5K run in September. I have been running, but this will help me push myself with an end-goal in mind.
Pound per Pound 
When I was reading about your struggles I thought about suggesting you sign up for another race but then I got to the end of the post and see that you thought of it too. I think it is important, especially during a plateau, to have a goal, or goals, that help keep us on point. I think a race deadline will help you do that. I know you said you will focus on eating proper meals this week but you should also consider switching around your meals, i.e. bigger breakfasts, smaller dinner or even change up the types of foods you are eating like more lean proteins and less carbs. Hang in there- you will get through this. I know it!
Thanks for the advice! Yes, the focus on proper meals has to do with the fact that this week I’ve been munching here and there rather eating a healty, balanced meal which has resulted in way more carbs (crackers, oh so many crackers!) and fewer vegetables which ends up leaving me less full and seeking more treats then usual. I’m a total night-eater, but if I don’t plan well then I can completely blow a good day with empty calories at night.
What is an absolute must for me is prepared meals. I do all my cooking on a Sunday, so I can have lunch and dinner ready at a moment’s notice. Pre-cook yourself some chicken breasts, oven baked omelettes, and some roasted veggies. It takes the guess work out of what to eat, and prevents nibbling/grazing. Protein shakes and vegetable soups are also great “go to” meals when in a hurry. Oh, and stock your fridge with juicy fruits. Good luck!!
Yes, I think pre-prepared meals are a must. I’ve definitely been slacking on that end so it’s not helping. Thanks for the suggestions 🙂
I’m sure you’ll get your motivation back. Sometimes it just takes a bit of a weight gain before you realize exactly what’s going on in your head. Have you read The Beck Diet Solution? It’s not a diet, but deals with the mental aspect of weight loss. It’s interesting and might give you a bit of a kick in the pants. 🙂
Thanks for the suggestion! I haven’t read it (or heard of it actually) but I checked it out and it looks very interesting. I think the mental aspects are definitely what I’m having trouble with right now. Thanks 🙂