Weight Loss

Holy Emotional Eating Batman!

Wow. So the other day I had a bad day at work and ended up having to stay late unexpectedly. Given I already work 12 hour days a 14 hour day was even worse because I wasn’t prepared. I didn’t have my dinner, I didn’t have plans that evening but I did have lots to do that night that I had to do when I got home.

Well what happened you ask!? I got home in a foul mood, I had started snacking badly at work because I wasn’t prepared with a healthy dinner or snack to tie me over so when I got home all I wanted to do was to eat, eat, eat. And that I did! I huge soup topped with lots of cheese and bread on the side followed by a big bowl of popcorn as I settled in to stay up late to get to the work I had to do.

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It was such a clear case of emotional eating! I sometimes wondered if I was an emotional eater or not. Or if really at the heart of it of it all I just eat big portions. I know for sure I eat when I’m bored, other than that I had never really noticed if I ate when I was feeling  particularly happy, sad, or angry. But I am definitely noticing the connections now. Sheesh! How many years have I been at this?!

It’s good to see the connections though as it can only help me to plan ahead and fight it. I can talk to myself and be clear that I’m only eating because I’m tired or angry or upset. The first step is acknowledging the problem right?

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Weight Loss

Weigh-in Week 196: And it goes on

Well this week wasn’t actually that bad – I was up 0.1lb for a new weight of 160.7lbs and a total loss of 90.9lbs. I’m not feeling too bad about it as that aforementioned cold really did me in this week. Dare I say the Flu?? Maybe it was, but it really knocked me out so I wasn’t doing much exercising or moving and even drinking water was difficult. I was drinking tea, but I do add sugar to it and I ended up eating lots of comforting foods like breads that were easy to digest as I’ve also been fighting a cough so it left me feeling very exhausted. This week didn’t get off to a great start  but I’ve tracked everything and I’m feeling on track for the rest of the week. So here we go!

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Weight Loss

Weigh-in’s Week 194 & 195: I haven’t disappeared!

Nope! I’m still here, but I got sidelined by a new job and wicked cold that has actually kept me from the gym and doing pretty much anything other than working and then coming home and sleeping. But I have been weighing-in! I’ve decided to switch my weigh-ins to Wednesday mornings. With this new contract starting I can’t make my Tuesday lunch-time meeting anymore and my leader has a 7:45am meeting on Wednesdays. I can’t stay as I have to work at 8am, but at least I can come and weigh-in and check in with my  leader which is a great motivator.

So my summary  – week 194 wasn’t so great. I was up 2.3 lbs to a new weight of 163.8. However, the following week (195) was much better and I was down 3.2lbs so I’m down to 160.6lbs and a total loss of 91lbs. I definitely feel much better at 160. Weight Watchers had a special promotion this month – I suppose to encourage new members to keep at it over the month of January. If you weighed-in 4 times over January you received a new WW charm ring. Not a key ring as it’s open at the top but a ring on which to keep your charms. I was so happy to get mine! I love all that kind of stuff – I think I’ve said it before that it’s silly, but I do love it.

Here it is!

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So usually when I work I find it hard to lose weight as we have SO much food around – we have fully stocked kitchen with all sorts of snacks and we order out everyday or have catering. Since we work 12-hour days it gets difficult to make lunch in advance and although we have time for lunch, we don’t have a dinner break so reaching for the not-so-healthy snack gets easier. However for this contract the company is not paying for our lunches so that is motivation to make my own! I’m not being very adventurous right now, but it fills me up and keeps me going. My lunches have been pretty much just steamed vegetables – probably about a 1 1/2 cups and some protein. I made some cod at the beginning of last week and then grilled chicken breast on Thursday and Friday. I also cut up some tomatoes/cucumber/peppers with a tablespoon of hummus. It’s tasty and keeps me full which is important. I will take the time on Sunday to make 5 lunches for the coming week – I think I can keep this going and that’s very motivating!

Weight Loss

Weigh-in Week 193: Finally down again!

Alright, alright. Finally. I am down a significant amount. FINALLY! Tuesday at weigh-in I was down 1.9lbs for a new weight of 161.5lbs and back into the 90s with a total loss of 90.1lbs. I haven’t been at this weigh since October 22nd. That following week I gained 4.2lbs and I honestly feel like I’ve been trying to lose it ever since.

…Okay, so with all good intentions I started this post on Tuesday evening after my weigh-in but since then my life has been a bit crazy and I never got back to it. I’ve also been doing some hibernating here and there.

Well let’s see – what’s new…I bought my first every WW cookbook. This one:

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Yes, it’s a bit older but it looked like it has some good, quick easy meals inside which I’d like to try. I’ve also been keeping up with my running and exercising, but I have been changing things around lately which I hope will lead to weight loss. I’d love to get back to 150…that was a good weight for me.  I want to write a detailed post about my exercising lately. Oh so many posts rattling around in ma head I just haven’t gotten down. I will.

I’ve also been meaning to post a round up for 2013 and some goals for 2014 (as those of you who have been reading know I don’t believe in resolutions). I’m working on it…I swear! Things are just getting pushed back right now. I thought I had loads of free time, but it’s been disappearing fast and a deluge of work is coming…

Weight Loss

Weigh-In Week 192: And the year ends not with a bang…

…but with a whimper. Alas I was up (though to be fair, not as much as I thought I would be considering it had been 2 weeks since I last weighed-in). I was up 0.7lbs so new weight is 163.4lbs and a total loss of 88.2lbs.

This post is short and sweet, but I am working on one for tomorrow about the new year. In the meanwhile enjoy the day everyone! I decided to treat this day no differently and went to the gym to do my weight training session. So happy I did – I always feel great afterwards!!

Cheers

 

Happy New Year everyone! May 2014 bring with it joy, success, and happiness to all in all your endeavours. Here’s to another one!

Weight Loss

Weigh-in Week 191: No Weigh-In

Well it was xmas eve last Tuesday and although I did have every intention of going to weigh-in as the centres only closed at noon that day and the one near my mom’s house has a meeting at 10am – I didn’t end up going because of the ice storm that hit Southern Ontario. Our big dinner with all the family visiting is on the 24th and with the ice storm everything got pushed back and I stayed at home to help my mom prep everything. The trip to the meeting would have been a minimum 1 1/2 hour excursion because of how far in the country they live and I just couldn’t leave her alone that morning.

I figure one week isn’t too bad. To be honest I’m not expecting a loss on Tuesday when I go weigh-in. I’m not throwing in the towel, but rather I’m trying not to get my hopes up. Whatever will be will be and 2014 is a new year and a new chance to get to goal – and that’s what I intended to do.

It’s funny – well not ha ha funny, but you know what I mean – I’ve been thinking a lot about my reasons for losing the last 20lbs that have been plaguing me for the better part of 2 years now. I had a bit of an epiphany today: I realized that I have never actually, as in truly, believed that I would reach my goal weight. That’s right. It was always this mythical idea that was far, far away. Not a concrete goal that I new I could reach. And I’ve realized that this has been holding me back.

So much of weight loss is the mental and emotional aspects of it. We all know how you can never really change for anyone, if someone wants to lose weight/quite smoking/decrease drinking etc. the desire has to be genuine and come from within. If we ever set out to do something to appease someone else we’ll end up failing/quitting/giving up because we weren’t doing it for ourselves and because we wanted it.

I need to really sit down and think about why staying at this weight is not something I want (it isn’t – I know that much at least!) and why losing the last 20lbs is worth it and worth the changes I need to make to get there. I’m going to work on this this week. I need to write down what I’m thinking and feeling and make sense of it. I want 2014 to be the year that I finally reach goal! I can do it. There is nothing stopping me but myself.  🙂

Reaching Goal

Weight Loss

Weigh-In Week: 190: Up a little again

Ooph! So this post got seriously waylaid by the holidays. I started writing it on Tuesday and then it got put aside…then I traveled for the holidays to my mom’s house – which is in Southern Ontario and since then we’ve been hit with an ice storm! Ack. Seriously I was in Montreal when the big one hit in 1998 and now this one. I’ve had enough ice storms to last me a lifetime thank you very much.

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So now I get back to it…

Okay. Today I was up 0.6lbs for a new weight of 162.7lbs and total loss of 88.9lbs.  Gotta say this up a couple pounds down a couple pounds is really getting tiresome. I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I wasn’t nervous that this dancing around the same spot for the last couple years could cause me to go overboard. I don’t want to gain back all the weight. I really don’t. And I’d like to lose this last 20ish pounds and get down to my goal weight and actually focus on maintenance, not just by default. 😐

I had a conversation with my WW leader and she asked me why I was struggling. Good question.  Very good question. And I don’t know the answer.

A little over a year ago I wrote down seven reasons why I wanted to lose weight. However, something I’ve noticed is that the reasons I had outlined  before to lose weight no longer really apply. And to be honest, although it was  a topic at our WW meetings about a month ago – I’ve realized that I’m struggling to find new reasons.

Reason 1: To be Considered – I no longer feel out of the norm, when I meet a guy for a date or show up at an interview I no longer worry that someone is going to be surprised by my physical appearance (i.e. my weight)

Reason 2: To be Comfortable in my Body: I no longer feel uncomfortable. Sure, sometimes I feel swollen and bloated and some clothes feel tighter every now and then, but in general I don’t give my body the same thought I used to. I don’t get out of breathe easily – in fact I always choose stairs over an escalator or elevator when given the chance. I can bend over, I carry heavy items, I fit easily in chairs and booths etc. I no longer worry my body won’t be able to do something I want it to do.

Reason 3: To Wear Pretty Clothes: Ok, so it’s not like I can wear anything I want – I still have these huge calves and my body isn’t tiny – I’m about a size 8-12 depending on the type of store (e.g. I’m an 8/small at Old Navy but a 12/large at higher end stores!) — but over all I’m able to find cute and pretty clothes. In fact I discovered I really like wearing cute dresses and have a whole collection!

Reason 4: For my body to be a machine: Fine, it’s not a machine…yet…but you know what it can do a heck of a lot! I can run a 5K without a second thought and in fact run a 10k. I weight train often and have actual muscle definition. The notion of joining a sports team or going for a hike or bike ride are actually exciting me nowadays rather than terrifying. I look forward to new ways of moving and testing my body.

Reason 5: So my weight doesn’t stop me from living my life: You know what? It doesn’t…not anymore. I actually can’t remember the last time I considered my weight when I thought about doing something. I’m actually a little bit in shock as I write this because I really haven’t considered my weight in a long time and I’m a bit surprised by that. Wow. I’ve come a long way.

Reason 6: To not be out of breath: Wow. It’s been a long time since I’ve been out of breath doing everyday things. Now even when I exercise and I get out of breath I get excited because I know it means I’ve pushed myself further. I look forward to being out of breath – again I can’t believe by how far I’ve come.

Reason 7: To be happy with my life: “Happiness is a journey, not a destination.” -Alfred D. Souza. Ain’t that the truth. I can definitely say I am happier now then I was then. But it’s all a journey and it’s nice to

Here is where I find myself – I have to find my new reasons. The reasons to take me past this blip and onto goal…